ONENESS

“Therefore, shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”  (Genesis 1:27) Marriage should be a refuge of love, joy, and comfort. That’s why we have this institution of “oneness” of “one flesh”  

Definition: The quality of being one; singleness; sameness; identity; unity of thought, feeling aim; harmony; uniqueness.   Genesis: 2:23-24; Proverbs 18:22

When Adam was presented with woman he knew immediately that he had found a good thing. From the heat of godly passion, Adam named the woman. He named her in a unique way- after himself. Some say that Adam was so in tune and in proper relationship with God that the spirit of prophecy came upon him and he declared: “ ..therefore, shall a man leave his father and this mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” 

Cleave means “sexual intercourse” However, when it’s translated, it’s turned into “being joined together”

New Testament: Ephesians 5:31 “Joined” “to be adhered to” and can refer to the physical act of sex. But pros indicate a deep intimacy, a face to face encounter. When you put the two words together, the Bible is describing the one flesh [oneness] relationship between husband and wife.

Therefore in verse 24 its saying that since he had found joy in his woman, there are certain things that must be done in order for them to become one. Becoming one flesh is a process .

One must leave and cleave before he can become one.

1. Leave is something that they both had to do. Genesis 1:27; Pslams 45:10, 11) to leave your parents means that the priority of your relationship with them MUST change.

2.  2. Cleave, means to be joined to, to stick to. Totally united in life, purpose and pleasure. “Let a man forsake    or abandon his father and mother in order that he may cleave unto his wife and in order that they might become one flesh. If he does not leave, he cannot cleave, nor can he become one flesh.

“Become” is the strongest indication of change “to be” getting married is like becoming a Christian.

     II Corinthian 5:17 

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!

Same thing, we commit ourselves to Christ, trust Christ faithfully and completely regardless of how we feel or what problem arise. This is why marriage is symbolic of Christ’s relationship to the church in 

Ephesians 5

One Flesh involves more than just two individuals having sex. In the act of sex, husband and wife have a relationship, not just a physical experience.

Man and woman are the only creatures God designed to have sexual intercourse face to face. Binding your body, mind and soul. With a face to face relationship we have the spirit.

Three benefits for oneness:

  1.        When two are together and one falls, the other can help the other up

              2.        If two lie together they can keep each other warm   
              3.        If two are attacked, together they can fight and overcome the enemy.

      

      Note: A cord of threefold is not quickly broken. The strength in oneness is in God. Two together shows marriage on a physical level, but in natural and spiritual level the third cord that binds both into oneness is God’s covenant.

                                         Where two and more are gathered he is there!!!

                                                  Enjoy each other

BASIC NEEDS OF A MAN & WOMAN....

"How can two walk together except they agree?" Amos 3:3

A wife or potential makes herself irresistible to her husband/man by learning to meet his five basic needs: 

1. His needs for admiration and respect. She understands and appreciates his value and achievements more than anythings else. She reminds him of his capabilities and helps him maintain his walk with God and also his self confidence. She is proud of her husband/or potential, not out of duty, but as an expression of sincere admiration for the man she loves and with whom she has chosen to share her life. (Ephesians 22:23, 33)

2. His need for sexual fulfillment. She becomes an excellent sexual partner to him. She studies here own responses to recognize and understand what brings out the best in her, then she communicates this information to her husband, and together they learn to have a sexual relationship that both find repeatedly satisfying and enjoyable. (Proverbs 5:15-29, Song of Solomon 4:9-5:1, I Corinthians 7:1-5, Hebrews 13:4)

3. His need for home support, she creates a home that offers him a atmosphere of peace and quiet and refuge. She manages the home and care of the children. The home is a place of rest and rejuvenation. Remember: the wife/mother/potential is the emotional hub of the family. (Proverbs 9:13, 19:13, 21:9,19 25:24)


4. His need for attractiveness. She is possessed of inner and outer beauty. She cultivates a Christ like spirit in her inner self. She keeps herself physically fit with diet and exercise, and she wears her hair, make up, and clothes in a way that her husband/potential/man finds attractive and tasteful. Her husband is pleased and proud of her in public, and also in private. (Songs of Solomon 1:8-10, 2:2, 6:13, 7:9, I Peter 3:1-5)


5. His need for a life companion. She develops mutual interests with her husband/man. She discovers those activities her husband/man enjoys the most and seeks to become proficient in them. If she learns to enjoy them, she joins him in them. If she does not enjoy them, she encourages him to consider others that they can enjoy together. She becomes her husband's best friend so that he repeatedly associates her with the activities he enjoys most. (Songs of Solomon 8:1-2, 6)

The Seven Basic Needs of a Woman


Any husband can make himself irresistible to his wife by learning to meet her seven basic needs

1. Her need for a spiritual leader. He is a man of courage, conviction, commitment, compassion, and character. he takes the initiative in cultivating a spiritual environment for the family.  He becomes a capable and competent student of God's Word and lives out before all a life founded on the Word of God. he lead his wife/woman in becoming a woman of God, and he takes the lead in training the children in the things of the Lord. (Psalm 1, Ephesians 5:23-27)

2. Her need to personal affirmation/appreciation. He praises her for personal attributes and qualities. he extols her virtues as a wife/woman, mother, and homemaker. He openly commends her, in the presence of others, as a marvelous mate, friend, lover, and companion. She feels that to him, no one is more important in this world. (Proverbs 31:28-29, Songs of Solomon 4:1-7, 6:4-9, 7:1-9)

3. Her need for personal affection (romance). He showers her with timely and generous displays of affection. he also tells her how much he cares for her with a steadfast flow of words, cards, flowers, gifts, and common courtesies. Remember: Affection is the environment in which sexual union is enjoyed and a wonderful marriage developed. (Songs of Solomon 6:10, 13 Ephesians 5:28-29, 33)

4. Her need for intimate conversation. He talks with her at the feeling level (heart to heart). He listens to her thoughts (i.e. her heart) about the events of her day with sensitivity, interest, and concern. Conversations with her convey a desire to understand her, not to change her. (Song of Solomon 2:8-14, 8:13-14, I Peter 3:7)

5. Her need for honesty and openness. He looks into her eyes and, in love, tells her what he really thinks (Ephesians 4:15) . He explains his plans and actions clearly and completely because he regards himself as responsible  for her. He wants her to trust him and feel secure. (Proverbs 15:22-23)

6. Her need form home support and stability. He firmly shoulders the responsibility to house, feed, and clothe the family. He provides and protects, and he does not feel sorry for himself when things get tough. Instead he looks for concrete ways to improve home life. He desires to raise their marriage and family to a safer and more fulfilling level. Remember: The husband/man is the security hub of the family/relationship. (1 Timothy 5:8)

7. Her need for family commitment. He puts his family first. he commits his time and energy to the spiritual, moral, and intellectual development of the children. For examples, he prays with them especially at night be the bedside. He reads to them, he engages in sports with them, and takes them on other outings. He does not play the fool's game of working long hours, trying to get ahead, while children and spouse languish in neglect. (Ephesians 6:4, Colossians 3:19-20)